©Kerrie O'Hearn Marquart

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©Kerrie O'Hearn Marquart

Sunday, January 23, 2011


Marriage: Uniting of husband and wife. (Webster's Dictionary)
that sure has a hollow sound, does it not? Ha!
Ephesians 5:21, 22, 25-28
 Honor Christ by submitting to each other.  You wives must submit to your husbands' leadership in the same way you submit to the Lord... And YOU HUSBANDS SHOW THE SAME KIND OF LOVE TO YOUR WIVES AS CHRIST SHOWED TO THE CHURCH WHEN HE DIED FOR HER, to make her holy and clean, washed by baptism and God's Word; so that he could give her to himself being holy and without a single fault.  That is how husbands should treat their wives, loving them as parts of THEMSELVES.  For since a man and his wife are now ONE, a man is really doing himself a favor and loving himself when he loves his wife.

The caps are my own, of course!  But I wanted to emphasize the point here as many men just quote the part about wives submitting to their husbands and as you can see there is much more to a marriage than this.

My husband and I have been married 51 yrs. next month.  We are still in love and treasure every moment together.  Are we unusual?  Not really.  There are many couples who feel this way.  "I am the half, together we are the whole,"  This is a saying we created on a wood puzzle we used to make.  It was in the shape of a heart and only had 2 pieces with the first half of the saying on the left and the second part on the right.  This is how we feel about each other.  Together we are the whole.

Jesus is like this.  We are all missing something in our make up that makes us a whole person until we find Jesus who can fill that empty place that makes us complete...

1 Peter 3:1-7  Wives, your godly lives will speak to them better than any words.  Don't be concerned about the outward beauty that depends on jewelry or beautiful clothes, or hair arrangement.  Be beautiful inside, in your hearts with the lasting charm of a gentle and quiet spirit which is so precious to God.  That kind of deep beauty was seen in the saintly women of old, who trusted God and fitted in with their husbands' plans.......You husbands....remember that you AND your wife are partners in receiving God's blessing and if you don't treat her as you should, your prayers will not get ready answers.

My hubby and I have always pulled in equal yoke throughout all the years together.  We help one another, we love one another, we are kind to one another.  I have never stopped saying or doing the things that I did and felt when we were first married.  I still thank him for anything he does for me.  I still consider his feelings so that I do not hurt him by criticizing his habits, looks, clothes, etc.  We are all human and of course we had disagreements through the years.  Marriage is work.  It does not become a good marriage without any effort on either part.  It is a union.  We laugh a lot!  We find humor in almost everything and laughing takes away a lot of the tension in any situation.  Even in illness, terminal Multiple Myeloma, my hubby still makes me laugh a little every day!

   I wish all of you were blessed with a good partner.  If you had nothing else, it would be your one blessing!  Try to remember how you felt when he or she first touched your hand, first kissed you, first did something nice for you.  Keep the love alive.  And as the verse says about not being concerned regarding beauty, I do contend in bible days, all women looked terrific in head scarves draping their heads and framing their faces.  Not so today.  So at least present yourself attractively to one another.  Men admire the attractiveness of other women, their smiles, their pleasing scents, ad infinitum.  Give them what they are attracted to at home. 

   When my children were small, I always took a shower and changed into something nice before my hubby came home from work because I WANTED to look nice for him!  He appreciates that to this day and when I fuss a little extra, he tells me how pretty I look and I feel so blessed and gifted with his love and remarks.  Do I have a model's figure?? LOL! Of course not but that does not stop me from being as attractive as I can be for my hubby!
    Let's face it ladies, we all love compliments, it is our inherent basic need-LOL!  Don't wear make-up, hate dressing up?  Okay, but you don't have to slouch around in sweat pants and bed-head!!  Casual dress can still be attractive.  I have always felt the downfall of women with waists was the invention of the MOO-MOO dress!!  Women could eat as much as they wanted, gain weight and become shapeless because they would always fit into that MOO-MOO dress.  Cows Moo!! Women used to take pride in their slimness as it was a sign of being healthy -  Less chance of diabetes and a host of other physical problems.  And if it is a physical problem, consult your physician so that he can help you.  And don't forget to PRAY ABOUT IT!  God does care about your physical well being as well as your spirituality!

     Men need to consider the same factors.  Where did that healthy young man go with all that hair and flat tummy go?  When did that chubby bald guy sneak in and take his place-LOL!  Of course I am exaggerating but you get the point.  Marriage is a gift, a blessing, a union of two hearts brought together by God.  The Lord gave you your body, too.  It is a dwelling place for the Lord so do not abuse it.
 And lastly for today, Anger.

Ephesians 4:26, 27  If you are angry, don't sin by nursing your grudge.  Don't let the sun go down with you still angry--get over it quickly; for when you are angry you give a mighty foothold to the devil.
James 1:19,20  Dear brothers, don't ever forget that it is best to listen much, speak little, and not become angry; for anger doesn't make us good, as God demands that we must be.

In marriage we cannot be angry and nursing a grudge.  Anger will eat away at you coloring all of your days with darkness because you won't give up your angry feelings.  Each day is a new day, don't remember the bad of yesterday or bring it into your tomorrows.  Don't let yesterday ruin today...

Please come back again soon!
My Christian Heart to yours...

1 comment:

Ginny said...

We are so very blessed to have our men, Kerrie! I feel the same way about my Phil, we have been together over 40 years now. We make each other laugh constantly. And we have never called each other names, that is something that you see other couple do so much, it seems. They were just talking at church about the other part of that verse, only the part about wives submitting to their husbands is emphasized in churches, it seems.